A local charitable organization very kindly bought us a sit-on mower the other day.

I say ‘very kindly’ but I’m not convinced that it was an entirely good idea.  The thing is, you see, that our gardener - let’s call him Richard (mostly because that’s his name …) - is now like a dog with two tails.  (There’s a less couth expression than that, but for the sake of propriety, we’ll stick with the two tails.)  He LOVES his little tractor mower.  It seems to my (admittedly fevered) imagination that every time I look out of the window, there’s Richard, chugging round the garden mowing stuff.

I fear for our lawn.